i have had a productive few days. several new paintings are either in the works or completed. i bought a stack of small, pre-stretched canvases from my pals at utrecht the other day so i could set up a sort-of assembly line in the studio. i just line up these small (9x12) canvases and work on them consecutively as needed. it allows me the emotional detachment necessary to not fall in love with them too soon. when i paint large it's such a commitment that i get to a point of apoplexy - i have invested so much time and material into the thing that i don't want to "ruin it". these small canvases seem more disposable.
so i have to confess that the engine behind my recent motivation is a little book that steff gave me which contains fifteen reproductions of Howard Hodgkin paintings. in the ten or so years that i have been painting, there have been a few occasions where i see work by someone that completely alters the way i think about painting. my evolution is owed to seeing the work of Matisse, Beckmann, Guston, Soutine, and Basquiat. with Hodgkin it was even more profound. when i saw his work for the first time i felt like it said to me "it's ok". it's ok to paint in this way that i had only thought about, written about, and sometimes dreamt about, but had failed to actually perform. it was liberating.
i realize that right now i'm sort of dealing with a schoolgirl crush on Hodgkin and my paintings are attempts at respectful aping, but once i work through this i will find a new place where the simplicity, reduction, and abstraction that i have long been striving for are incorporated into my conscious process. until then i am just enjoying making these marks!